We are in the last days of the first month of the new year. Shit, seems like this will be a short year as well. Still struggling to switch the mind into work mode, it is still in a holiday space. I had the most amazing weekend in Rustenburg. Me, mom and a few of friends. I had so much fun, and not one hangover. What was sad though was the moment I got to PTA (or some time before PTA) a bad depro struck.
What brought it on I do not know, if no one knows where thoughts come from, who knows where depros come from. Tried to sleep it of, went out for drinks with friends and found myself back at home, not even retail therapy could cheer me up (4 CD's later). Why do I have this marriage with loneliness (note to self, Leanord Cohen does not help)?
What's lonliness anyway? According to Wikipedia: Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than just the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected from, and alienated towards, other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any form of meaningful human contact. Lonely people often experience a subjective sense of inner emptiness or hollowness, with feelings of separation or isolation from the world.
Seems to sum it up. Shit this is the first post of 2007 and it is so depressing. Are we predisposed to be loners and are loners predisposed to be lonely? Is this another chicken and egg situation?
Do we bring this upon ourselves - or is this just a collusion of circumstances and external forces? I do not know, but intend to find out.
Once I have solved this riddle I will try to enlighten you.
What brought it on I do not know, if no one knows where thoughts come from, who knows where depros come from. Tried to sleep it of, went out for drinks with friends and found myself back at home, not even retail therapy could cheer me up (4 CD's later). Why do I have this marriage with loneliness (note to self, Leanord Cohen does not help)?
What's lonliness anyway? According to Wikipedia: Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than just the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected from, and alienated towards, other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any form of meaningful human contact. Lonely people often experience a subjective sense of inner emptiness or hollowness, with feelings of separation or isolation from the world.
Seems to sum it up. Shit this is the first post of 2007 and it is so depressing. Are we predisposed to be loners and are loners predisposed to be lonely? Is this another chicken and egg situation?
Do we bring this upon ourselves - or is this just a collusion of circumstances and external forces? I do not know, but intend to find out.
Once I have solved this riddle I will try to enlighten you.
1 comments:
Dude, I had the same thing. First I had the crappest new years in history (not counting the time I got food poisoning) and came back to Pta just to be more depressed than I have in a long time. Luckily I came to my senses and decided that being depressed makes me negatively inclined and is drawng other negative things to me. I am quite determined to draw only positive things and will light a candle on my love/positive energy shrine for you too. Things can only get better, and if they don't - well - lets focus on not making them worse..
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